A Struggling Mother
Discovering the Riches of God in Relationships
14. Early the next morning Abraham took some food and a skin of water and gave them to Hagar. He set them on her shoulders and then sent her off with the boy. She went on her way and wandered in the Desert of Beersheba.
15. When the water in the skin was gone, she put the boy under one of the bushes.
16. Then she went off and sat down about a bowshot away, for she thought, “I cannot watch the boy die.” And as she sat there, she began to sob.
17. God heard the boy crying, and the Angel of God called to Hagar from Heaven and said to her, “What is the matter, Hagar? Do not be afraid; God has heard the boy crying as he lies there.”
18. “Lift the boy up and take him by the hand, for I will make him into a great nation.”
19. Then God opened her eyes and she saw a well of water. So, she went and filled the skin the water and gave the boy a drink.
20. God was with the boy as he grew up. He lived in the desert and became an archer.
Genesis 21:14-20 NIV
The Source of the Struggle
The observation of Mother’s Day is a global celebration that is shared by over forty countries world-wide, as it pays honor to women for their sacrifice, nurturing, and love for their children. It is a day in which we pay respect and tribute to heroines and champions who have taught their children many life lessons and have often coached them through the challenges and obstacles they have faced in life. All mothers have struggled in some way. They each have given in order for their children to be blessed.
The American celebration of Mother’s Day, according to the online source Wikipedia, began in 1907 in a Methodist Church in West Virginia. Anna Jarvis, the organizer of that first event, recognized the day with worship and a tribute to motherhood as a gift from God. Truly it is that, although it is now commercialized as all other holy days. If for no other reason, we all should be thankful that we had mothers, otherwise, we would not be alive today.
Let us also celebrate mothers for the many challenges they faced and still face as the times become more demanding than ever before. Many mothers have had to go it alone due to “absentee fathers.” Many mothers have endured not only the pain of child-rearing but also spousal abuse. We cannot ignore the ugly fact that emotional, physical, and even spiritual suffering has accompanied motherhood. But if you asked many mothers, “would they do it all over again” many would respond with “Yes.” That is a mother’s love.
For Hagar, the struggle was all too real. She found herself not only unemployed but also homeless on the same day. As we think about Church Folk Attitudes, we cannot overlook the fact that Hagar was put out on the street, not by a greedy landlord, but by two who believed in God. Yes, Abraham and Sarah gave Hagar her eviction notice. Don’t get me wrong, they were justified in sending her away, but one might question the way in which this act was carried out. Sometimes in the zeal to do what God has directed them to do, believers not only go overboard, but throw others overboard in the process. For Hagar, the struggle was all too real.
Here is the way the scenario played out. Sarah noticed that Hagar’s son, Ishmael was mocking or abusing her young infant Isaac. So, Sarah directed Abraham to put Hagar and Ismael out. They were to be sent away because Ishmael was not to have part in Isaac’s inheritance. At this point, they were totally justified in their actions. Abraham was even admonished by God to let Hagar and Ishmael go because of the spiritual implications it would make on his descendants later. That part they got right. However, on the day of their departure, Hagar only received a ration of food and a bottle of water. I find that a bit harsh considering the fact that Abraham was rich. He could have given her at least two donkeys and a couple of sheep. There was no severance package for her employment. There was no gift to the son Ishmael. There was only a ration of food and a bottle of water that would last for only a few days at best. They did not get a complimentary tent, not even a pillow on which to sleep. All too often, that is the attitude of Church Folk when they want to get rid of you. Believe it or not, that has often been the attitude of Churches toward single motherhood. Many Churches take the position that single mothers not only made a mistake but are also a mistake. Lord help us Church folk and our attitudes.
The real kicker in the case is the fact that Hagar’s pregnancy was caused by Sarah and Abraham. She was just a slave girl. They were the ones that came up with the whole “surrogate mother” idea. They were the ones rushing ahead of God and trying to create their own miracle. Now sadly, Hagar was the one holding the bag of someone else’s failed miracle attempts. Isn’t it something how Church Folk will often place blame on others when something goes wrong. Then when they can’t resolve it, they will ostracize and kick others to the curb and say, “put them out of the Church.” Lord help Church Folk.
Help in the Struggle
You and I know what it is like to wake up and find your world turned upside down. It is not only frustrating, but also a fearful time. Early the next morning Abraham took some food and a skin of water and gave them to Hagar. He set them on her shoulders and then sent her off with the boy. She went on her way and wandered in the Desert of Beersheba. Having been given her ration, Hagar went out to an uncertain future. This would be a good place to interject, that Hagar represents human actions and attempts to find a life through the works of the flesh. Yes, Abraham and Sarah were right in putting that chapter of their lives behind them. You and I would be justified in doing the same. No one can find life nor live a life pleasing to God through the works of the flesh. The Apostle Paul described the putting away of the bondwoman as the only way to find true freedom through faith in Christ. See Galatians 4:28-31. Even Hagar had to wake up to the reality that she could not live without God’s mercy and goodness. Let’s take a look and see how the story ends.
As it turned out, the food and water rations did run out. Hagar was now in a desperate place. She had gone from a place of wealth and security to a place of dire need in no time. When the water in the skin was gone, she put the boy under one of the bushes … Then she went off and sat down about a bowshot away, for she thought, “I cannot watch the boy die.” And as she sat there, she began to sob. When we think about Church Folk Attitudes, we must also address the temptation to “throw in the towel” when things go wrong. That was the Hagar way. All her life, she had never faced responsibility. All her life, someone else had made decisions for her. She never really saw the need to worship because she simply hung around blessed people. Thus is the attitude of those who demand that others pray for them but never take the time to pray for themselves. Now Hagar was facing a real life crisis and needed God. But something unusual happened in the story.
God did not hear Hagar’s crying, but rather, He heard and recognized the child of Abraham crying under the bush. Isn’t that strange. God heard the boy crying, and the Angel of God called to Hagar from Heaven and said to her, “What is the matter, Hagar? Do not be afraid; God has heard the boy crying as he lies there.” Had Hagar tuned God out and turned off the voice of faith in her heart? Only Heaven knows the answer to that. Nevertheless, God was not done with Ishmael. Because He was Abraham’s son, God in His great mercy came to the rescue of both Hagar and Ishmael. What a blessing to know that God is right there in the time of struggle! What a blessing to know that God hears our cry! What a blessing to know that when our supplies run low, God’s mercy still runs high! What a blessing to know God!
Here is where I find a great truth that applies to mothers as well as all believers. If God has to take us to a “rough place” in life to get our attention, He will do just that. The most important thing in life is not to have all your needs met, but to bring you to the place where you recognize you need God. God heard the cry of Ishmael and poured out the blessing upon his life.
Life After the Struggle
At this point you are probably wondering what happened to Ishmael? The answer is that once they found the water, they also found a future in God. It wasn’t just the water they needed; they needed to confirm their faith and their identity. God gave Hagar specific instructions on what to do next. That is where we all come in. As we honor mothers, we too must think about the next steps in our lives. Thankfully, with God, there is always a next step to that faith walk. Don’t continue with the old attitudes of the flesh when you can find a brighter future by trusting and following God.
The Angel gave Hagar some specific instructions on what to do. “Lift the boy up and take him by the hand, for I will make him into a great nation” … Then God opened her eyes and she saw a well of water. So, she went and filled the skin the water and gave the boy a drink … God was with the boy as he grew up. He lived in the desert and became an archer.
Most people simply drift from one crisis to another. That is the life of a slave and a victim in life rather than a victor over life. Through Christ, we have been called to live after the struggle. Every struggle should propel us forward and not hold us back. The first step to getting there is to get out of the comfort of somebody’s else’s blessing. Clearly, Ishmael was seeking the inheritance that rightfully belonged to Isaac. That did not mean there was no blessing for Ishmael, it did mean that he was in the wrong place to receive it. Hagar and Ishmael had to arrive at a place where faith could be birthed. God knew the place and it was in the Wilderness of Beersheba where they would cry out for help.
Second, Hagar had to break her dependency on Abraham and Sarah in order to find there was something she could do. She could open her eyes and her heart and listen to God. Single mothers must realize that God knows the burden they carry, and He wants to help. So stop crying your eyes out about what you’ve lost and open your eyes to what is being given to you. Then God opened her eyes and she saw a well of water. Stop closing your eyes in a state of panic! Stop saying what you can’t watch even as the dread is still playing out in your mind. Let God open your eyes to behold wonderful things out of His Word. There is so much to see but it is on the other side of your tragedy, your trauma, and your failed attempts at life. God is your life – so live.
Lastly, you must receive God’s provision to live life going forward. So, she went and filled the skin the water and gave the boy a drink … God was with the boy as he grew up. Yes, God supplied them with water for their immediate need, but also God supplied Ishmael with a future and a hope. While Hagar and Ishmael did not mean as much to Sarah, they certainly meant something to God. The Lord blessed Ishmael to become twelve tribes; he had twelve sons that would dwell in the regions from Havilah to Shur near the eastern border of Egypt.
In conclusion, none of us know when a life crisis will hit. We do know that life crisis do happen. It would be very beneficial to not wait until the struggle is real before you develop real faith in God. The only way to get to the other side of the struggle is to trust in the Living God who always leads us to victory. God bless.